mzhelenp's Blogs

Lessons Learned

2008-06-16T12:02:00Z

I read the success stories of people losing 40, 50, 60 pounds in 6 months and for a while I was beating myself up for not getting to my goal. Then at face to face meeting with NS's "mother hen" PamSB, she pointed out something I had overlooked. I kept saying I was spending a lot of time "off plan" and Pam pointed out that I hadn't gained any weight through all that, and had maintained at around 139-140 for a long time. She's right! I've actually learned how to maintain an over 20 pound weight loss!!!!

I've been really good the past week, and with another week and a half to go I will be at 138 prior to my next shipment, so I'll have that little goal bear. But more importantly, I know that I can keep at the weight I am!

I've had some really nice NSV's along the way. I've gotten back into lots of my clothes, took in some pants to be taken in, and am wearing a pair today that will likely need to be taken in as well. I did all this without as much exercise as I should have been doing. And instead of beating myself up for not exercising and not being at goal yet, I'm starting to celebrate my success. I wonder sometimes if we are all too quick to jump on our own perceived failures and not congratulate ourselves for what we actually have accomplished.

When I first joined NS I put 140 as my goal. I changed it to 138 so I'd have the "float" of a couple of pounds, with the intention of staying around the 140 mark. And that's exactly what I have been doing. I know that NS has given me the tools to stay at this healthier weight. I also know that I truly have permanently changed my eating habits. I don't eat as much at one off-plan meal as I used to. I think before I stuff something high calorie into my mouth. Even when I cheat it's not as much, or as bad, as I used to.

In one week I'll officially qualify to join AARP. That has me totally freaked out and depressed, as I never have been able to think of myself as that age. But I also can, for the first time in many years, get on the scale at the doctor's office and not cringe at what I see.

I'm truly grateful for NS. And I'm grateful especially to the boards - I don't think I'd have stuck it out with the friendship and support of so many people I may never meet. Between recipes for taking away boredom, info on the buddy bucks program (even though it's all messed up now, it has saved me a fair amount of coin over the past 6 months), even clueing me in to the Nourish items at Big Lots, the boards are a key component of my success. And I've made friends too, even more importantlhy.

So for the next week and a half I'm working the plan to hit that magic number. And I know I'll do it. But more importantly, I know I won't ever see 150 on my scale again!

Almost There!!!

2008-03-31T05:13:00Z

I am >< that close to goal! I just need to really focus for a week or 2 and I'll hit it! I SO want to do it before my next shipment - I want that little gold "goal" bear in my box! Silly isn't it, how a little beanie baby type bear can mean so much? But it does! It represents hard work (especially for a "cheater" like me), and it's a visual reminder of the weight I've lost.

It's funny - I look at pictures of myself 20 pounds ago and I used to think I looked fine. Now I see that my frame was getting chunky. Losing 23 pounds has not only put me back into all of my clothes, but I look better in pictures too!

Finally bustin' through that plateau!

2008-01-07T09:44:00Z

I really was off-plan quite a bit from Thanksgiving through New Year's. Had many meals out at restaurants, holiday meals, "cheating" snacks, etc. Yet I did try to remember everything I've been learning and wasn't as "bad" as I've beeni n the past. And I did eat a number of NS meals whenever possible.

The good news was that I maintained! I stayed at that 143 mark for over a month. Yes, hitting a plateau can be frustrating, but at the same time NOT gaining weight over the holidays I consider a major victory in and of itself.

Well, looks like I've finally started the slow climb down to goal! I'm bouncing between 142 and 142.5 (so set my ticker at 142.5). I think by Saturday, my next official weigh in, I may be at 142 officially!

It feels so good! Dave seems to constantly be surprised at how thin I am (compared to where I started). A couple of weeks ago I put on my denim capris that I bought 2 years ago, and he was like "nope, no good - those are way too big on you and you can't wear them." And my grey pants now are too baggy also. Then Friday the weather had turned cold so I pulled a nice pair of black Ann Taylor wool pants out of the drycleaning bag of winter clothes. I bought them in Arizona so they are only a few years old. Well, the waist is too big! I had to pull them tight and close with a safety pin! So now I have at least 2 pair of pants to take to the tailor!

NS really does work. I thought with less than 25 pounds to lose it was "over reacting" and that I should just do it myself with diet and exercise. But I know I never could have achieved this on my own. And what I've learned will stand me in good stead moving forward.

4 to 4.5 pounds to goal, and depending upon how long it takes me I *may* lower the goal to 135! That would be the thinnest I've been since my 20's! That may not be reachable, but I AM setting 140 as my ceiling. Once I'm on maintenance I will continue to weigh in, and if I creep up to 140, it's back on NS for a week or 2. My plan is to always have 1-2 weeks of NS food in the house, and I may continue to order the lunches ala carte because I like them!

Thanks NS - 2008 is the year of looking great for me!

I LOVE NSV's!

2007-12-05T12:49:00Z

I have this nice pair of brown dress pants. For the past 3 years or so, I haven't been able to fasten them (I have to admit I've used a long safety pin, and then worn something untucked over them). Well, I'm WEARING THEM TODAY FASTENED!!!! I didn't think I'd be able to do that yet (-18 pounds) but I am! And they aren't cutting off my circulation LOL!

These NSV's certainly make it easier to keep going! I get my next shipment today and I'm hoping for some of the Advanced versions (i've only gotten cereals, some desserts and tacos last time).

WOO HOO!

Feeling GOOD!

2007-11-28T12:13:00Z

Just before I started NS I was on a business trip back to Arizona. In fact, my NS box arrived the day I got home. I had to wear a pair of black khakis as part of a "uniform" for a trade show booth. Man, they were snug! Of course, it didn't help that I was snacking on chocolate goodies the whole time.

I also have 2 silk shirts that I decided to stop wearing. They were tight across my chest & waist, and the buttons would gap very unattractively when I sat down.

Well, today I decided to test out the pants and one of the shirts. HOLY SH*T! Amazing what a difference 16.5 pounds can make! The pants are quite comfy, and even a bit baggy in the butt. And the shirt is loose all the way around. Talk about motivation!

I was just starting to get depressed too - my friend David sent me this photo of us at his sister's wedding back in '89 or '90. I was soooo skinny then! Under 130 lbs, which was tough for me to maintain. So having this NSV today with my clothes definitely has lifted my spirits.

The holiday weekend was tough. I was off plan quite a bit, but also tried to stay within guidelines. Except for Thanksgiving Day itself, I don't think I went over 2000 calories any day, which is why I maintained (and according to the scale the past 3 days, I'm actually down 1/2 pound, but I don't count it or put it on my ticker/page until my official weigh in on Saturday).

Yes I pigged out Thanksgiving, but I had a NS breakfast first, a NS snack at noon and then we ate around 4. The next day I made a brunch for Dave's family, so I had french toast souffle, some fruit, some homemade bread. That night we went to a steakhouse, but I was pretty good - got a 7 oz. sirloin, salad with ff dressing on the side, and steamed broccoli. Saturday I was on plan all day until dinner - we went to a seafood restaurant. I had grilled tuna, with the sauce on the side. Seasoned green beans, and steamed broccoli. I put half the beans & half the tuna into a to-go box. I did cheat by having 2 pieces of their amazing banana bread, but again even though I knew I wasn't at weight LOSS level, I also wasn't at a GAIN level.

Sunday was an afternoon BBQ at Dave's brother's house. I had a burger with no bun, some salad, a little pasta salad and a little macaroni salad. And 2 cookies. But the rest of the day was on plan.

And Monday was on plan except for dinner - a Mexican restaurant. I had no booze, and ordered this awesome salad with seasoned chicken. I had them skip the avocado and considered the cheese my fat. Yes, I cheated some with a small bowl of chips and salsa.

Overall I learned that maintenance will not be an issue - if I can maintain during all that eating out, doing it while cooking for myself should be OK!

Hanging In....

2007-11-16T12:09:00Z

Thanks for all the kind words and support the other day! I'm still struggling psychologically but I'm determined! It looks like I may not lose any weight this week, based on what the scale said this morning, or at most 1/2 pound, but I did have a NSV today.

A couple of weeks ago I got into a pair of jeans I haven't worn in a few years. They were SNUG, but wearable (and I wore 'em just coz I could). Dave thought they were still a bit too tight to wear.

Well, I put 'em on this morning and they fit PERFECTLY! Even a teeny bit of room in the butt. And I think I've only lost maybe 2 or 3 pounds at most since I last put 'em on!

That is definitely incentive to keep going. I still can't get into my burgundy jeans that I used to practically live in 4 years ago, and I'm no where near my black jeans. But I'm making true, visible progress!

Now Comes The Tough Part

2007-11-14T03:25:00Z

Sigh.....I'm at 15 pounds down and am hitting that proverbial wall. It's soooo freakin' hard staying focused. I'm finding myself adding a little bit here and there, cheating on my free foods, having a bit more veggies. Yeah, I know they say we can have lots of veggies, but veggie calories are still calories! And they still add up! I have to try and stay around that 1200 calorie range or I won't lose any more. I wasn't one of those who used to eat 3000-4000 calories a day, I probably was around 2000-2500, so for me to lose I really have to be careful. And I'm getting demotivated.

I wanna go back to eating "normal." I wanna grill a steak on the grill with Dave. Have a glass of wine with the steak. Pop a Zatarain's rice in the microwave for us to share with dinner. Have a bowl of Grape Nuts Trail Mix for breakfast.

Up till now I've been OK, but I'm at the stage where I'm only going to be losing a pound or so a week and while rationally I know that and I know it's healthy, one lousy pound for a whole week's worth of work seems unfairly low!

Yeah, I know I should get to the gym, but with Dave working from home most of the time now, I get home from work and want to spend time with him. If he'd go to the office more I'd probably be able to convince myself to drag my butt to the gym when he's not home. But I've never liked exercise anyways...

I'm spending probably too much time on the board, trying to keep myself motivated. I need to somehow find the strength to give myself that proverbial kick in the butt. I still have a "3 months pregnant" lower belly and can't figure out what exercises to do to work on that, since crunches only seem to help the upper abs.

Dave's proud of me, but he is sensing my declining enthusiasm and motivation, and has started asking me if I'm cheating. I'm not, well not really (maybe only an extra 100-150 calories a day).

I really want to do this! I WANT THIS TO WORK! I want people to call me thin again. I don't want to be old either, but I have no control over that.

I joined a team (team purple) to try and motivate myself so I have responsibility to other people (like on The Biggest Loser) but it still ain't easy....

Not sure why I'm babbling all this, maybe just needed to put it down....

I'm Really Doing It!

2007-11-05T04:41:00Z

I've always been thin. Was never crazy about my build since I'm flat chested and had a bit of a big butt. But overall I was pretty OK with my body.

It seems like each decade I'd somehow put on 10 pounds. I watched the scale move up from the 130's to the 140's to the 150's, and I never really did much about it. Yeah, a few times I'd go on a diet and drop 5 pounds, even tried Atkins, but once I went back to eating "normally" the weight would eventually creep back. I even did a starvation diet of under 1000 calories per day in my 20's, along with the gym 5 days a week, and managed to get down to about 127. My waist was miniscule, but I couldn't maintain that.

I joined a gym about 3 years ago, and while that did seem to tone me up a bit, it really didn't do anything about my weight. My clothes were getting tighter, and I had more & more things I couldn't wear. I actually gave up on some of my best Ann Taylor suits and sold them at a high-end consignment store, figuring I'd never get back into them.

I moved to Florida and in with my SO in March of 2007. I was cooking dinner for us every night, and the scale started slowing creeping up a little more. Dave started noticing, and even dropped little hints. Then one morning in September I got on the scale and saw 162. I'd always sworn I would never be over 160, and here I was. Facing my 50th birthday next year, I felt fat. I looked flabby despite exercise. My stomach was all pouchy like I was 4 months pregnant. I didn't feel good about myself, and was having trouble finding clothes that fit right. I finally said enough is enough.

I'm busy, and lazy. I knew I could never deal with all the counting and doing it myself of Weight Watchers. I considered Jenny Craig, but was totally against the idea of having to weigh in with some 20-something "counselor", and have her push vitamins or JC supplements on me. I'd seen the NutriSystem commercials, and when they showed the Dan Marino one with all the athletes I decided "screw it - if they can do it, I can too." So I picked up the phone and called.

My first shipment arrived while I was out of town on business, so I started NS on my return (after of course eating everything in SIGHT on the trip). Saturday, 9/22 was my first day. The first few days were tough: I missed my "regular" food, was tempted by everything, and was still hungry. At the end of that first week I think I'd lost 1, maybe 2, pounds. But by then I'd discovered the Boards. I was blown away by the amount of information & support there. So many inspirational stories of people with HUGE weight losses, like Pam and Donna and Robin and I8NY. Heck, if they could do it I had no business complaining about a lousy 22-24 pounds! I knew I had no excuse, and that if I didn't succeed it was no one's fault but my own.

I found recipe ideas, protein suggestions, meal ideas, shopping info, free foods lists. So I kept pushing. It's now 6 weeks later, and I'm down 14 pounds. 14 pounds! I haven't been this thin in probably 5 years! I've started fitting back into some of my old jeans again. I need to find more time to exercise to help tone up my arms and continue reducing my belly, but I'm looking MUCH better than in a long time. Dave has certainly noticed, and compliments me on it regularly. He's really proud of me, and proud of the resolve and determination I've shown.

I'm only 10 pounds from my goal. And I believe I really will get there! I'm refusing to quit until I see the numbers 1, 3 and 8 pop up side by side on my scale.

I was feeling guilty about "only" needing to lose a little over 20 pounds, but I realize that whatever the actual amount, it was still holding me back. I'm learning how to eat healthier, I'm learning portion control, and I know I can maintain once I hit my goal. I'm also going to always have a week's worth of NS food in the house, so if I see myself creeping over that 140 mark, I'll jump into a week of NS to get it back under control.

I'm grateful to NS (despite my frustration with all the subs) for giving me this "training program". And most of all I'm grateful to all the wonderful folks on the NS boards for their constant support & inspiration.