Hip Hip Hooray!!!  Goodbye you miserable 170s.  I will NOT miss you!  I squeezed into the 160s with an official WI of 169.8 today.  Whew, that was close.  haha.

I turned 33 this week and, unfortunately, it caused me to do a lot of self-reflection. Personally, I've had a bit of a roller coaster ride, but that's a different kind blog.  Here, I'm going to focus on my NS weight loss journey.  I've learned quite a bit during these past 2 months. I've learned to look at myself and see the positive instead of dwelling on the negative. I've learned that making good choices brings a happiness that is more true than the temporary happiness I used to get from excessive comfort food. I've learned that my body is capable of so much more than I thought it was. And, I've learned that I do have the time to take care of myself. I may not be exactly where I thought I'd be at 33, but I'm going to continue making myself a priority, thanking God for every beautiful day He gives me and my DS, and being true to my own heart.

When we were in Disney for New Years, I saw a Tinkerbell t-shirt that really struck me -- "Faith Trust and Pixie Dust."  This is exactly what I need for 2010.  I need faith because I've been tested, a lot.  I definitely need to remember how to trust -- not just in others, but in myself.  Equally important, I need to find a little magic and whimsy.  Fairy tales and pixie dust.  Life gets so serious -- work, kid(s), bills, exercise.  This year, I going to try wishing on a star. 

YIPPEE!!!!! I am in week 8 of the couch to 5k program. For 7 weeks, I have been running 3-4 times per week and I have done ... ok. The first several weeks were good -- I ran when I was supposed to and looked forward to the walking intervals. The first time I had to run 2 full miles without walking, I was SO proud of myself because I did it -- almost -- I had to take 1 or 2 quick little breaks to get a drink of water. Well, once I gave myself permission to take a "quick little break" in the middle of a running interval, I broke my momentum. Then, every time I had to run for more than a mile, I allowed myself to take quick little breaks, as long as I got through the first mile. Now, I will give myself credit -- I was really working hard and my heart rate was high and I was burning mega calories. BUT, when I added up all of my breaks, I realized that I was NOT MOVING for 1/8 mile of my 2.5 mile run last week. That was pretty discouraging.

I had a rough weekend. Like so many others, we got lots of snow. Between being snowed in, and the holidays, and TOM, I was really lacking in discipline and motivation. I ate cookies. Not NS cookies. Chips Ahoy cookies. And Oreo cookies. For no reason.

Today, I picked myself back up. I stayed 100% on plan. I got back on my TM. I RAN 2.75 MILES WITH NO (NONE!) QUICK LITTLE BREAKS. I did not eat one thing that was not on plan today. Not one bite of a pretzel. Not one sip of lemonade. I feel fantastic! Of course, I ran at 10pm, so I'll probably be up until 3am, but who cares?

I'M BACK, BABY!!!

1. 5k in the spring.
2. 1M fun run with DS4 each month April to November.
3. 5k in the fall.
4. Finish a 5k on my TM in under 30 minutes.

So hard to believe that I am actually setting RUNNING goals!!!

I was running on my TM today, as I do 4 times per week. I'm finding that I am really starting to love it. Anyway, for some reason, my heart rate monitor stopped picking up my pulse. I moved it around. I put more water on the sensors (though I was sweaty enough that I shouldn't have to). I yelled at it. Nothing worked. Then, it hit me -- it was too loose!!!! So, I tightened the strap and, sure enough, it worked again. Not sure if I would consider that a "victory," but it's a non-scale something! Hope everyone is having a great day!

I got my first bear! How cute he looked sitting in my box of yummy new food. I haven't officially hit 10 pounds yet (I think I'm at 9.6), so it was a very nice surprise. My asparagus is also happy to have the mushroom risotto back -- in all its glorious tomato-sauce-free wonderfulness!

I am also very happy to report that, after 6 weeks, this is starting to feel normal. Almost makes me wonder why I needed this major change in my lifestyle to realize something I should have known all along. Every day is not an excuse to eat something unhealthy. A salad and a zone bar seems like a perfectly reasonable lunch to me now. On the average day, I don't feel like I'm giving anything up or depriving myself. I sometimes feel like I'm taking care of myself, but mostly I feel like I'm just following a routine that is becoming very natural to me.

Now I can start looking forward to that next bear!

We all know what a b@$t@rd that scale can be sometimes. I mean, can he hold a grudge or what?!?! So, I made some good, some not good decisions on Thanksgiving. That morning, I weighed in at 176.4. Friday, 178.6, Saturday 178, Sunday 177.4, this morning 177.4 again. Finally, tonight, after my run, 176.2. It's ok, scale, I understand -- you've made your point, but I am so happy that you've finally forgiven me! Any chance he will reward me with a little drop before my Thursday weigh in? Last time he was mad at me, he held out for about 6 days, but then dropped a couple pounds overnight. Is there a repeat performance in my future? :)

Regardless, I am back in my size 10 pants!!!! And I'm super excited about it! :)

I'm a little techno-challenged and I can't believe I'm posting these pics on the internet, but here it goes... One month in. Down 8 pounds. Doesn't sound like much, but I see it!

Moving on. Today, I am going for a hair cut, then DS and I are going to mom's for some decorating. I have a plan -- breakfast first, save my morning snack, early lunch before I leave, yogurt and blueberries there, come home, late snack (saved from morning) here, dinner, dessert. And WATER!!!! I am wearing another pair of jeans today that fit but not so well. And, most importantly, I am going to have a wonderful day with my family. Of course, if they bring out cinnamon buns, I'll have to shoot them. :eeks:

I know, everyone is blogging about the holidays. Yes, it's the holidays, and I should tell myself "get over it." But, I still struggle with feeling downright angry that everyone else is eating what they want and I, for some reason, have to eat less. I know, I know, I "want" to eat less because I'm on this fantastic weight loss journey, but, honestly, it's not feeling so fantastic right now. I ate yesterday. I ate more than I would have eaten on a normal day, but less than I would have eaten on a normal (ie, pre-NS) holiday. The bizarre part is that I don't even like my grandmother's cooking. Never have. She made some artichoke and white bean dish for me, which was very nice, but it was nothing wonderful. I didn't eat all that much, but I just kept waiting for something on my plate to be SOOOO good. Didn't happen. So why did I eat it? "Melissa, if you're going to make bad choices that slow your weight loss, at least save them for food you like." Seems pretty obvious. Today was ok. I ate all my food and nothing extra, but I did not exercise and I did not drink nearly enough water. When I stepped on the scale this am, I was up 2 from the day before. I weigh every day, so I know myself enough to know that tomorrow will be worse because it always seems to take a full day to show up on the scale. BUT, on a positive note, the jeans I wore yesterday have never fit me before and I got many compliments on how good I look -- surprised me because I haven't even hit 10 pounds yet. So, Thanksgiving is over, tomorrow is another opportunity to be 100% (including exercise and water), and Christmas is 28 days away. I'm not going to wish the holidays away just to get to January. I have a wonderful little boy who is super excited for Christmas. We are going to enjoy December for reasons that have nothing to do with food. I am going to try very hard to stay on track.

I have written my reasons for wanting to lose weight a few times and I always hid them in various places so I could pull them out when I needed them, but NO ONE else could see them EVER. This time is different. I am posting it right here for everyone to see because this time I'm committed.

1. I want to feel sexy!
2. I want to feel in control.
3. I want to wear the pretty clothes in my closet and enjoy shopping for smaller sizes when these get too big.
4. I want to reduce my risk of diabetes.
5. I want make a better first impression.
6. I want to be a good role model.
7. I want to enjoy going to the beach with my friends.
8. I want to look good in DS's childhood pictures.
9. I want to be a hot mama!
10. I want to live as long as I can.

I could easily come up with 10 more. Makes me wonder -- if I can easily spit out allll the reasons I want to lose weight, what took me so long?

I hope to NEVER see you again!!! I haven't seen the 170s since last summer -- the last time I tried NS. I was comfortably sitting in the low 170s, lowest I'd been in years. I felt great and I thought I looked great. Then, I was out with the man I was with at the time and another man asked me if I was pregnant. I was mortified. So, I showed him by gaining 10 pounds, then 15. I watched it happen and actually encouraged myself to weigh more. "You're still at 178. You've got 2 pounds to go. Have some ice cream!" Sick. Of course, I didn't stop at 180. I pushed right up to 188. I don't want to know that person ever again. Now I want the next decade LOWER, not the next decade higher! Here I come 160s!